Bullying: A Problem with Power

Bullying. Webster's dictionary defines it as, "the process of intimidating or mistreating somebody weaker or in a more vulnerable situation." We live in a world of black and white. A world of standards. A world driven by the need for power. We all got told "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Well here I am, 16 years old to tell you I would rather have rocks thrown at me then words. Just because someone isnt't pretty enough, smart enough, strong enough, atheletic enough, or whatever it is, they are discriminated against. They are bullied. They feel the pain of not being powerful.

Cold Hard Facts

In the year 2010, 2.7 million students were bullied, by 2.1 million bullies. For those of you who go to school, look around next time you're there. See the empty desks in your classes. For every fifteen that don't hold a student, one isn't there because of fear of being bullied. For every ten people you go to school with, one will drop out or change schools because of bullying. In fact, 77% of students say they have been bullied. Out of that, 71% say it is an on-going problem in their life.

Elena's Story

 The girl to left was a classmate of mine. Her name is Elena Janelle Rendell, she was 17 when she shot her sister and killed her. The girl to the right was her sister, a 14 year old eighth grader named Christina Sneary. This is Elena's story. Elena didn't quite fit in at Northview High School. She was a sophmore who had special needs. I was a witness to her daily torment. Someone always had something to say to her. Dike. Loser. Retard. Lesbo. Whatever it was, my classmates threw words like rocks; with the intent to hurt her. Now, Elena did get bullied but a decent amount of it was justified. She would start to pick fights with anyone just to prove she could. In a friendly game of touch football with ROTC she started trash talking to me. I let it go. It happened again. I let it go. It happened again. I was ready to show her that I wasn't going to take it but someone told me it wasn't worth it. I didn't know her story, and I never would. With that thought in my head, I walked off the field and left Elena Rendell to her own life. If you read the articles about her shooting her sister you get the story. If you read the comments, you get the facts. She killed her sister over a cell phone, and in one of the articles Rendell says it goes back to being bullied. An innocent, sweet, silent girl got killed over bullying. In this story it wasn't the victim who died, it wasn't the bully who got punished. It was the sister of both. I think everyone should go read these articles, and more importantly the comments.

 http://www.northescambia.com/?p=63166

My Story

 That would be me. Dark hair, blue eyes, and always up to something. Growing up I got picked on. I remember in 3rd grade it got so bad that I would come home crying every night. I asked my mom why I was ugly and why everyone hated me. She looked at me, and started to cry with me. I would go to school day after day and get told I was worthless. Hideous. Repulsive. Pathetic. Weird. Stupid. It hurt. It got to the point where I couldn't look in a mirror. The sight of seeing myself made me feel physically sick.

When I got to 5th grade though, I became popular. I had friends. I had power. AND I used it to make someone else feel like I use to. There use to be a guy named Ricky that went to school with me. He had red hair, messed up teeth, and smelled. I told him that everyday. I was blunt, and I was a bully. He changed schools because of me. He couldn't take the torment I made him go through. Looking back I hate myself for what I did to him. I made him feel like I did. I made him feel worthless, and hate himself for things that weren't his fault.

When I got to 8th grade I had stopped bullying people, but I didn't stop the bullies. Then one day on the bus I did. This girl was going off on a guy because he was different. I let her finish and waited to see if he said anything. He didn't. That was when I did. I told her that she was being a bully. That no matter how she justified what she just said to herself it was wrong. She needed to hurt someone else to make herself feel cool, and that, was anything but cool. She got really quiet. Everyone did. Her eyes were looking at me, and so were his. Both sets filled with tears. I told her we all say mean things. We all hurt people sometimes, but when we are the ones getting hurt it changes everything. We don't know what other people are going through, and chances are we never will. I told her I hope she was ok with who she was, because when the lights turned out at night, that's all she was guaranteed.With that I sat back down. The bus was dead silent except for the guy who just got picked on moving to sit with me. He said he would never forget that. He offered me money, a picture, whatever he could think of for what I just did for him. I told him I was making up for what I did to other kids. I told him I needed to use my voice to help someone else find theirs, because no one did that for me when I was little. I needed to do that, to be ok with who I was when the lights went out.

Bullycide

Matthew Bibby was 6 when he ran across traffic trying to get away from bullies. He was hit by a car and killed. Karl Peat was 16, intelligent, considerate and planned his own funeral before his suicide. He killed himself by way of overdose because he was picked on for not joining a street gang. Sisters Michaela and Samantha are bullied about their weight so they go on a hunger strike. Both of them later die. Adam Grigg hanged himself after enduring 3 long years of bullying. He was 14 and wanted to be in the Royal Navy. If you click on any of these peoples names you will go to a website entirely focused on bullycide. The website has over 50 stories and links to newspaper articles, court cases, and memorial pages. Some stories are from the United States. Some are halfway around the world. The sad thing about all these stories are their lives could of been saved. They could still be alive if the world didn't turn a blind eye to bullying. I guess we will have to say a few more goodbyes before we finally realize it doesn't have to be this way.

Conclusion

You've heard stories of homicide, suicide, and self-inflictaed pain because of bullying. Because of a word that afterall, can't hurt you. After hearing these stories, seeing these pictures, watching these videos, can you tell yourself words don't hurt? Can you tell yourself that bullying isn't a problem? You read the opinion of a pyschologist. You got to hear about my personal story of coming full circle. You saw the numbers, heard the statistics. Now it's your decision as to whether you stand up and speak out or let more innocent children fall to the hands of bullies.